16:24 - 12.28.03
woohoo. so many things happened the past few days. and i am perplexed. about some things. first, i managed to muster enough courage to apologise to farah. but it sure felt good at the end of it cos now we are friends again! :) i have a few words of advise to everyone if i have the chance to tell it to anyone: think before you do something. that reminded me of something. i read an email on my personality being a gemini. and now i see it. i do get myself in dangerous situations because i always do things rashly. at first, i thought, am so not that kinda of girl. and i realise after the whole episode with farah that i sometimes speak without thinking beforehand. so, that was how i get myself into trouble. and that wasnt the first time. i told omar that i was always used to having a leadership role by choice or not. and it took a while when i first started work that i had to report to someone who is slower than me. or at least not as hyped-up as me. so i am now tryin to improve myself by being more tolerant about other people's weakness. yes, i shall do that in 2004. as for now, am gonna gloat/ curse/laugh at others when i want to.
the wedding turned out nice for a few reasons. i met lots and lots of his family members and friends. it was a simple affair if going by the standard of traditional weddings. they didnt have lotsa clothes and pics taken. nothing was too extravagant or lavish. and i had some fun. i am quite stressed out now about being called a bakal. too soon. too many times said and to strangers. i dont know 2/3 of the guests who came and all of them started asking him, "oh, when is your turn?" while casting an eye to me. ahhhhh.... not now. not so soon.
wait.. what is too soon or too late? and is it so bad to be single? i am attached and i am very happy. but i feel disadvantaged sometimes because i am attached. few days ago, i realise that i have forgotten how to go around to anywhere alone. it seems so distant, the feeling of havin to go for an invitation by myself. maybe this is normal. i hope it's not a sign of over-dependancy. no, it's not. no no no.
aaron was here!!!! with his wife though. his wife is short and thin.. ok looking. but her make up is flawless. straight hair made her looking a bit like an ah-lian. but well, look at aaron. suave, quiet, charming smile, tall and tanned. lucky her. but i managed to see him only for a short while. he left after meeting the producers, with his wife.
do i have the makings of an actress? hehe..
my friends always ask me why ex-girlfriends bother me. i dont hate them but they bother me. it bothers me that my boyfriend is still in contact with them, working and spending some of his evenings with them, working of course. sometimes, i feel that ignorance is bliss. cos now, i know there are certain things that could have been better not knowing and im uncomfortable with it. shut it out!! now!